I miss...I miss...I miss...

the best days of my life, was definitely the growing up process. not many gets the chance to be the first born grandchild to a relatively big family. on my mummy's side, my grandmama had 10 kids, 5 girls 5 guys. and a adopted kid whom we treated her as our very own family too.

i dun exactly remembered wat i did or how i was treated. but i was told, i was like the princess in the household. wo yao feng de feng, yao yu de yu( means getting everything that i ever wanted). this is especially so with my uncles, since i was the chubby and fair and adorable little kid. makes u wanna puke? haha..but i was ok..

i would get extra chicken pieces in my chicken rice. (i suspect the uncle has a crush on me! he is always smiling oh-so-happily whenever he sees me) so my uncles and aunties like to bring me along whenever they bought chicken rice from him.

i would attract stares from strangers when my family members bring me out for walks. and they would pinch my cheek and twist it one big round exclaiming "aiyoh!!! soooooooo cuteeeeeeeeeee!!!" i suspect they have a saddist nature...coz they always laugh when i attempt to rub my swollen cheek thereafter.

bank tellers would often chat with me and give me lotsa sweets. same goes to our family doctor. the first thing i stare at upon entering the consultation room, would be his jar of sweets. and that smart ass doctor would immediately open the jar and say "nah u want sweets ah? take lor. take more".

and i always enjoyed evening walks with my late grandfather. he often brought me to playgrounds where they have swings cause he knew i liked them. and he would swing me high. watching that smile on my face brings out the smile on his tired face after a hard day's work.

and if i wanted anything, i would just need to stop and stare at it. and my grandfather or even uncles would get the hint and asked me wat i wanted. i merely needed to point and the next i knew, i am the proud owner of it.

i miss sunday's mornings, where the whole house is bustling with people and laughters, where breakfast is either fried carrot cake or nasi lemak, where there's always no seats on the sofa and u have to "chop" seats way beforehand and not leave ur seats even if u needed to pee.

i miss going on all-expenses paid holidays with my aunts. where all i have to do is enjoy myself and be happy. i dun even need to do the packing of my luggage.

i miss being the center of attraction and being showered with everybody's love. and getting my way becoz i noe i have my grandparents to back me up in case anyone bullies me.

thinking i'm a little rascal too? nah...i guessed i'm just a little pampered and spoilt. but hey! i'm all tamed now. i had my glorious days and now its the younger devils' turns. hee.

everything sort of changed ever since my grandfather passed away. there is this rule that says u gotta get marry within 99days of his death or wait 3 yrs. so both my aunt and uncle got married and shifted out. gradually most of them did so too.

sunday mornings are no longer rowdy.

my grandfather is no longer around.

i'm no longer three.

i want a family of my own where i can enjoy this kinda family warmth again. where my kids can grow up happily. where everyone in the family would get along just fine. where i'll have my loving husband by my side, a doting daddy to the little ones.

hope this isn't too much to ask for? yes darling? hehe.
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and i miss my primary sch days. where i attended this neighbourhood school and it was so easy to top my class and level. and to date, i'm actually still in contact with my primary schoolmates.

playing five stones..attending higher chinese lessons..doing project together..taking part in the salad making competition..karaoke sessions at elizabeth's house..water bombs sessions..

those were the days...where there is no secret if u ever liked a guy in class..=blush=

it was such a trend to write in someone's autograph book. i'm flipping through it now...let me type some of the comments out...

"its my good fortune to know such a cuuutteeeeeeeee(highlighted in bright orange) friend like you. known you for two yrs, actually more. i found out that you are jovial, funny, cute and nice."-sandy

"i've known you for 4 yrs. during these yrs, i found out that you're a helpful, kind, hardworking and humourous girl. but sometimes you can be quite hot tempered and stubborn." - siahjen

"i've known you since primary 1. you are cute, funny and has an effectious laughter that will be forever in my brain."- chenghoon

notice the lousy grammer of us primary school kiddos? haha..and almost everyone says i'm stubborn and funny and cute!

sometimes i really hate to grow up this fast. i've lived for 2 decades already and its already creeping towards the big 21st day so rapidly. i feel as though i have done nothing at all. except having found the love of my life. argh i'm old!

=bangs my head on the table=