"the thing is," she said shakily, "the thing is - i'm not fine with you anymore."

"i don't believe this. i came here because i needed to be with you. but it seems like you're finding ways to break up with me."

"i don't want to," she whispered, "but i think we are breaking up all the same."

he put his arms around her and pulled her close. his lips found hers. she kissed him. then she looked into his eyes.

"you can't break up with me," he said, "you know you can't. not now."

it's my heart that's gonna break, she thought, as she held his gaze.

"i know now is the wrong time," she said miserably. " i feel such a shit. but there's never going to be a right time. and i just can't go on like this anymore."

he said nothing.

"loving you was great," she told him. "special. really special."

"you still love me," he interupted softly.

"i know." she bit her lip. "but sometimes it just isn't enough. its supposed to be, isn't it? love conquers all and that sort of thing. but maybe it doesn't, in the end. maybe sometimes you have to know when to call it a day."

we in the singapore is very the stress. we is so stressed until some peoples start toking incoherently.

for example...

situation 1:
my sis called her friend:"hello! you know who is i?"

and she didnt find anything wrong with it until her friend asked her wat IS wrong with her.

then she blamed me and my "i is" language.

why me?! I IS INNOCENT LEH!!!

situation 2:
qing: if you wan go die, ask me to go too k? i also wan to die.
me: okies. ahaha.
qing: u got $100000 to lend me? i wanna go shopping before i die. i'll return u my next life.
me: rupiah?
qing: no. sing.
me: har...dun have leh. i is poor.
qing:haizz...really? i very sad leh...i always dream of buying gucci and prada.
me: -.-"'

situation 3:
brother: my cock got no hair.
me: so sia suay. so big le still no hair. somemore so small.
sis: huh? you know whats the standard size meh?
me: -.-"'...hahaa dunno!
brother: eh today i overheard my female friend tell the teacher she started her menstration. i sensed something fishy so i purposely pretended i need to go toilet and overhead their conversation. hee hee hee.

i is dumbfounded.

life is sad....

...when u rush off from work an hour earlier just to attend classes.

...because exams are around the corner...1.5 weeks away to be precise.

....when you see those women standing opp ur school, with their tight fitting mini-skirts and being leered by men. its a sad sad situation. my school's in aljunied by the way, very near to geylang?

...when you know ur lesson is 4-hr long and its freaking late by time u are allowed to go home.

....when you know its near midnight by time i step foot in sembawang.

...when you happily exit the school building and see a whole row of cars, only that none is waiting to pick u up.

...when you know the only way is the train and as u proceed to the station, the sky above decides to grant u h2o. big big ones.

...when i know i'm feeling sad inside.

goodnights all.

emotionally screwed.

hardened heart.

but i have a new baby.

I punched a man today.

and i swear, its an accident. he can only have himself to blame for being short. okie that sounds mean, but it was really not intentional. i was stretching my arms to straighten my sleeve, and he walked past. the ironic thing was, i didn't know i punched him right in his eye, till my finger hurt and he turned back to glare at me.

oopsie...

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mr goh: we are ending class today at 5.40pm. for those making transport arrangements, please get ur whomever to pick u up after this time. and please, do not stand by the roadside. i had men approaching the students and asking them 'how much'. haha...please take note of our location ladies, and stand in the building while waiting.

so...how much?

i is will punch you in the eye and smack ur head solid solid.

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i is tired le.

oh, just to share with u guys, i heard yin yue ri ji a couple of days ago by lingzi, and the stupid story plus songs made me tear. right in the office. damn u tearglands. sighs, but without u, there will be no one to moist my eyes. haha!

我?相?只是一?意外.

everything was an accident.

this time its true k. no blogging le. i even recieved my entry proof!

I IS STRESS!

I IS SAD!!

this is a very kns feeling. i feel so fucked up now.

i cant have the caterer of my choice because of some rule, and the supposedly allowed caterer, their menu and prices sucks. like hello! do i look like a cai tau to you?!

i think, and i thought, maybe i can collaborate with the caterer of lao niang's choice by making the arrangments simple, and insisting its home cooked. but ppl tell me its not feasible.

then i think, and i thought again, come to the worse then BBQ lor. but who wants to get all dirty and greasy and smokey? and ppl who are so darn ai mei or pampered or dislikes bbq will stay away from the pit and starve. good! starve themselves to death lah! dun eat lah!!!

once again i think and thought, maybe i could hold it at my house. but wait a min, my chalet how?! lao niang de lao niang already paid up liao k? furthermore, the reason i booked the chalet was becoz i din want to hold it at my house! now what? cheebye fuck up lor.

so now i'm thinking, come to the worse worse, i will call it off, and enjoy myself at the chalet.

darn, thats just plain silly!

i hate such this. i hate turning 21. i hate exams. i hate the stupid arrangement.

i know, i said i wouldn't be blogging. but since i'm somehow spacing out facing my lappy, i figured, might as well blog a lil.

hickeys. layman terms-love bites.

how should i react when i am happily eating my noodles at lunch and suddenly my colleagues talk bout hickeys and how they are terrible at it?

and she is like 30+ with a 5 yr-old son?

call me conservative, for i am. but to listen to someone of her age rattle on how she simply couldn't make that love mark on her husband and yada yada on her sex life? spare me!!!

but she is a cute lil woman lah...

and the other accounts girl, she is a malaysian. very nice girl too...but her english is very the broken till i think my "i is" statements aren't that terrigible.

for example, she was talking bout salary the other day when she wanted me to complie the staff's mc and leave forms onto a spreadsheet.

she: you do for me this, then i can do the salalee k.

me is thinking, what is salalee..it sounded like sara-lee, and the cake brand immediately sprang into my mind. what was she thinking? we just had lunch leh!

just as i was about to ask her, she showed me the cheques and forms which i therefore concluded, salalee is actually salary. goodness me.

if u guys didnt know by now, i'm working at this building 3 busstops away from my house. its called northlink and its very factory shophouse like. and the admin lady the other day told me boss prefers us in office wear when i asked her bout the dress code.

kns. i everyday go work ma chiam fashion show, while the others look so sloppy. damn...i'm slowly starting to dress down...wear so nice also no handsome guys to flaunt to mah! though i must add, there are young and yandao chaps driving BMWs and Benz around the building. heehee.

my boss is loud and he stinks. his engerand totally sucks yet he wanna argue and converse in engerand. disgrace doesnt seem to be in his dictionary. ever wonder how other ppl might be laughing at ur poor use and pronounciation of the words? at least i know, i do.

the hardest expression, is the facade i put on my face to tell you i don't care anymore
the loneliest feeling of all, are the times when i still think of you

Lately nothing I do ever seems to please you
And maybe turning my back would be that much easier
Cause hurtful words are all that we exchange
But I can't watch you walk away

Can I forget about the way it feels to touch you?
And all about the good times that we've been through
Could I wake up without you every day?
Would I let you walk away?

No, I can't learn to live without
And I can't give up on us now

Oh, I know I could say we're through
And tell myself I'm over you
But even if I made a vow
I promise not to miss you now
And try to hide the truth inside
I felt cause I, I just can't live a lie

Could I forget the look that tells me that you want me?
And all the reasons that make loving you so easy
The kiss that always makes it hard to breathe
The way you know just what I mean

No, I can't learn to live without
Ohh, so don't you give up on us now

Ohh, I know I could say were through
And tell myself I'm over you
But even if I made a vow
I promise not to miss you now
And try to hide the truth inside
I felt cause I, I just can't live a lie

Ohh, and I don't wanna try

Ohhhh, I know I could say were through
And tell myself I'm over you
But even if I made a vow
I promise not to miss you now
And try to hide the truth inside
I felt cause I, I just can't live a lie
I just can't live a lie

But even if I made a vow I promise not to miss you now
And try to hide the truth inside
I felt cause I, I just can't live a lie

Oh, I cant live a lie
oh, i can't live a lie...

i'm taking a break.

if you guys think its because of that, then it is.

if you guys think its because of this, then it is.

for the rest, just take it as my exam break.

till i blog again...