it's been 30 months
once again we seek warmth through loneliness
no more longing...

losing each other's company
we learnt, to cut ourselves off from our past memories
resisting any atempts to miss you once again...

I always thought I would find,
the answer to convince myself
but my emotions were disrupted, with that very one call...

I've slowly gotten used to it,
filling my life to the fullest
having meals on my own, trying to live my life normally.

I've slowly gotten used to it,
to take love naturally
but I just can't understand, why does the skies seem so grey...
after you're gone...

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Memories..
they stay with you forever?

yes its a question, not a understatement..

i guess, its true, one can never permanently erase their memories, good or bad.
it just comes flooding back when something or someone triggers anything related to it.

i always thought memories ain't anything impt to me. not in that sense that i feel i wasted my time, more in the sense that "its over, and i'm moving on" way.

i'm so wrong.

i just chose to put it somewhere else in my brain/heart and lie to myself that i've moved on. and when times come that i have a sudden longing for that particular matter/person, it just comes back.

it usually doesn't stay for long, and i always remind myself not to feel any regrets since i chose things to be done this way, thus creating those memories.

its very harmless thinking, perhaps only to reflect how bored or lonely i feel at times.

maybe one day, some of u may become only part of my memory, and no longer part of my life...